I’m a spiritual person and people often wonder how I can possibly do the job that I do. I have to tell you. I love my job. I love helping people. I love helping people out of their suffering. So it’s a perfect match. I don’t counsel my clients to get divorced, in fact, I often try to talk them out of it. Over the years, I’ve come to realize that by the time they’re sitting in my office, their mind is pretty much made up. Now my job is often “Damage control.” I am very passionate about what I do, and I believe that life is a journey and that divorce and family law issues are part of the journey for many, many people half of our population, in fact. I heard a court-appointed therapist (the top in her field) testify, “In family law, the destination is HEALING.” I believe that this is true. The way can be treacherous, full of pitfalls on all sides. But with a good guide that has taken many down that path, so much suffering can be avoided, and the healing can begin.
I blog about this topic at http://www.divorcingyourkarma.org/ but just in case you’re interested, I’m posting some of those “spiritually-natured” articles here on my website.
The decision to divorce will most likely be one of the major decisions of your life. When potential family law clients come to my office, my “go to” plan is always to help them restore their marriage.¬† Unfortunately, the vast majority of my clients, by the time they are sitting in my office, have tried every route to save their marriage, and are at their wit’s end, and they believe that separation and divorce is their only option.
At this stage, when my clients feel that they have tried anything and everything to heal their marriage, I try to encourage and guide them to understand that how one ends a marriage, can often be one of the most, or THE most important chapters in the relationship. How one ends a marriage or long-term partnership is the foundation upon which you are building your new lives. You want to build it correctly, so what you later build on this site will be strong and lasting in other words, so that what you build won’t come crashing down again.
I do my best to help clients realize that they are still a family; this is especially true when there are children involved they are still Mother, Father, and Child(ren), and although they will now be “a family” living in separate homes, with potentially new family members (stepparents, new siblings) joining them, they are still for all intents and purposes, a Family.
If any of you are familiar with Parmahansa Yogananda, you will appreciate the following affirmation/prayer which he gave to help people who were struggling with the decision of divorce. If you aren’t familiar with Yogananda, you should be! I highly recommend his book, Autobiography of a Yogi‚ and any other writing of his which you can get into your hands and heart. In fact, a small brown box was given to the attendees of Steve Job’s memorial service on their way out from the memorial. It was the last thing Steve Jobs wanted all of his friends to think about. The box contained a copy of Paramahansa Yogananda’s book, Autobiography of a Yogi, a book that inspired Jobs throughout his life. It will inspire you too!
HERE IS THE PRAYER/AFFIRMATION:
Father, we came together in love. Teach us to live together in love, or, if it is Thy will, teach us to part in love and understanding. -Parmahansa Yoganada